Week 2 Of Grief Support Group
[ Wednesday March 29th 2023 at 8:25 pm ]
I enjoyed tonight's group. This is week 2 of 7.
One of the group members was unable to attend week 1. The group facilitators asked us to again share why we are attending. This gave me the opportunity to share some other memories of how my aunt helped me as a child. This reminded me of what was so special about her: Even if I needed to make a decision she wouldn't make herself she was able to be neutral while remaining supportive. I appreciated these times. Often she would position this in the form of a question: "Have you considered ________?". For the way I think and evaluate my decision making this was helpful to me. I had spent the time with my aunt doing other things and I was receptive to what she had to say.
We did a few group exercises tonight. One of these was to draw our grief. This could be abstract (such as lines of different colors and varying thicknesses) or relating to our experience by drawing a memory or a scene (such as a storm). What amazed me was how one of the group members drawing was close to what I drew when attending the group for the first time. My picture was a sketch of me with a black hole in my chest representing the void in my life that my aunt dying created. This changed for my in January. It transitioned to being about memories I have of my aunt and myself. I drew these.
We also had an exercise in pairs. I was paired with the person who drew similar to my drawing from the fall. The goal was a discussion about the stages of grief we've been through and what some of the resolution stages might be as they are worked towards. It was really nice having this one on one discussion with someone going through this. There was an understanding life experience brings.
One of the volunteer leaders is the same as in the fall group. I sent him a short email after week 1 to say I'd be mindful of not robbing the experience from the other group members in what I contribute. But if he felt this was becoming a problem just to send me a private message on Zoom and I wouldn't be offended. The leaders realized what I was and wasn't saying. They asked me to share by name when others didn't volunteer. I don't mind this. I don't want to rob the experience from others who gathered up their courage to seek help.
I am hearing some I didn't catch when doing this group in the fall from all the pain my legs were causing. I really appreciate the nurturing nature of the female volunteer. She is a nurse in her professional life. Her attentive and nurturing nature is evident. She asks good and helpful probing questions. The male leader is extraordinary good at listening and not making me feel rushed.
It is time well spent doing this. This has me thinking about trying to address some emotional related issues when my legs are paining me. I've intentionally avoided this because of the emotional stamina required to be in pain and having done a poor job of this as my physical challenges drastically worsened. I don't want to be causing my friends to be on their guard. I am feeling better equipped. I am just trying to make the best out of my 1 life.